In light of this need, I have decided to spend the next week {Friday to Friday} illuminating for myself, and for others, all that I have to be thankful for.
Day 1: Friday, November 22, 2013
Epiphany
Had a revelation...of sorts...tonight while watching Hunger Games in preparation for Catching Fire tomorrow. As I watched Katniss, so at home in the woods, I realized that I too feel at home in the woods. Of course this got me reminiscing all the fabulous adventures Jason and I have had in the mystical NC mountains, and I quickly became bitter wondering how I could ever feel truly "at home" when my world has been flipped upside down. Then it occurred to me, in the moonlit darkness of our "home" that holds so many memories, that my husband isn't ever gone.
Our lives do not end when the life of our bodies ends. Jason Edwards is still very much alive, we are just in different locations; he literally is away for a while. This may seem delusional to some, and I mourn for you. I am well aware that my husband isn't on some business trip from which he should be returning any day now, and I am also well aware that we will be reunited. Yes, that day may be afar off, and that is okay because I will continue to build our life here; I will continue to learn here; I will continue to achieve our goals here, and while I do, he will be working there. He will build our life there; he will continue to learn there; he will achieve goals I didn't even know we had- there!
It's true what "they" say: absence truly does make the heart grow fonder. I despise that I did not appreciate my husband for all that he is while he was on this earth next to me, so I work now to show him, by emulating his actions, that I cannot be the person I am without him as my companion. I am purely in love with the man of my dreams and only wish I could convey to him now, a fraction of what he means to me.
I am thankful for the man that taught me to love with all of my being, and I am thankful for a God who clearly must have bribed that man to love me!
Despite my brothers frugal nature I guarantee he actually was prepared to give everything he had to give even his full life here on the earth to be with you for eternity. I love you and am so thankful for you!
ReplyDeleteI love what you have written Cassie! You are such an amazing woman. I don't think Jason had to be bribed, he could see that in you already! Have a good thanksgiving and tell your family we miss seeing them on a regular basis!
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